New hope
by FrancescaBoscorelli
Summary: Loki returns to apologise and instead he finds something he had been wishing to have.Loki/Natasha, Natoki. I suck at summaries and the title sorta suck too, sorry. R/R


**Title**: New hope  
**Pairing**: Loki/Natasha, Natoki, Lotasha, Blackfrost  
**Disclaimer**; not mine.

**A/N:** This is losely based on a drawing I saw of Loki's lips sewn shut, I have no idea the story behind it but it inspired me to write this and make it a Natoki fic. Besides it gave me so many feels. so I'm sorryif I made Odin bad and manipulative, I'm aware he might not be like that and I just changed his personality a bit for the sake of the fic.

Enjoy!

**Fran**

* * *

I knew the day ahead of me would be different from the minute I woke up. I had a uneasy feeling inside my chest that didn't let me be, like a hunch or something like that, something that kept telling there was a thing meant to happen but I couldn't quite put my finger on it.

I had a strange night too, dreams disturbed me with images of a man in pain, blood spilled everywhere and his insides screamed for help, I had tried to reach out but the man vanished before my eyes. I woke up covered in sweat and whimpering from pain, not physical but emotional, the man's tears plastered in my brain.

When I reached to the dining room at the Stark Tower, my whole body stops functioning at the sight before me; there stood Thor, hammer in hand, chatting with Tony about something I couldn't understand. But what made everything strange was the man standing beside him, what really made my body cease to function; Loki.

Suddenly the memories of my dreams flash before my eyes as I take a look at his face, there were drops of blood dripping from his mouth, his whole mouth, small dots around it and he was unable to wipe it out as his hands were bound tight together with chains. Nothing would have made me react if it wasn't because he had been the man whose pain broke me last night. He had been man whose tears forced me to stay up for hours trying to get my sleep back again.

"What happened to him?" I find myself asking, the men's attention was immediately focused on me rather than the conversation they were having. Loki's eyes glued to mine for the first time in months, since he had been last seeing on earth, and instead of the anger they had reflected before this time all I could see was sorrow and pain.

Thor's eyes turned briefly towards his brother, he reached for the chains bound to his wrists and pulled him forward, like a master would do to his pet.

"My brother has been punished," Thor spoke, meeting with me, "Like he deserves."

It surprised me the coldness to which he spoke, though I can't blame him for being disappointed or angry towards Loki for what he had done, still something inside me strung me as odd but it wasn't something concerning Thor's feelings, it was something about me and the whole thing about him being punished.

"What did you do to him?" I asked walking a few step towards the wounded man. I peeked at his pale complexion, the red dots around his mouth stood out and so did the dry blood from it.

"Father thought the best way of ignoring his words of lies was to not hear him saying them any longer." Thor explained "So he sewed his lips together."

My head immediately snaps towards him, shocked at his words. Loki had clear signs of torture; his face was not only covered with blood but with cuts on his forehead as well as his cheeks. It looked like he had been suffered the cruelest of tortures at the hands of those he had once called family, the images of him being bitten and his lips sew together made me sick to my stomach.

He swallowed hard, obviously in pain, and I reach out to touch his face but Thor stopped me before I could make any physical contact with him  
"Don't let his innocent look deceive you, agent Romanoff. He's still the man whose bitterness and feels of revenge destroyed the world you call home; he doesn't deserve any sense of compassion."

"Well, I don't know how your world functions, but in here if we see someone in pain, we help and right now he is. So why don't you step aside and let me clean your brother's wounds?"

He stepped aside, watching me as I remove the chains from his wrists slowly. Thor was in defense mode immediately, probably thinking Loki would take this opportunity to attack me or make a run. Strangely enough he didn't.

I take a hold of his cold hands and lead him away, towards my room. I have no idea what I'm doing or why I'm doing this for, but the sight of his blood, his bruises, his cuts reminded me of those times in which I was also beaten to unconsciousness, until I couldn't feel my limp body from the pain and the only thing I prayed for was a hand to healed my wounds. I had never found it and I had to learn to heal on my own.

We reach to my room, I lead him towards the edge of my unmade bed and he sits quietly. It seems weird to me he hasn't spoken since he arrived, but maybe the pain is too much and therefore being in silence must be the first and only option.

I take the first kit aid from my bathroom and sit next to him; I take his face between my hands and force him to look at me. He frowns but remains quiet, his eyes close briefly under my touch and I swallow the lump on my throat.

"I'm going to clean your face, okay? It's going to sting a little..."

He remains frozen as I wipe the blood away, I go as gently as I can and even if he's in pain he doesn't show. My hands tremble unconsciously and my heart beats faster inside my chest. It's the first time we have been this close, the last time a glass separated us and he had been the cruelest, coldest man I had ever known. The man before me now was hundred times different to the one I had seen, he looked weak and lost, less strong and menacing and his eyes didn't have the mischievousness I had once seen.

Even though I hated Loki with passion this new side of him made me feel nothing more than sorrow and pity for him. All cruel and evil men deserved to be punished but there was something about this man I was knew as evil that made my heart clinched with pain.

"Who did this to you?" I ask softly, almost desperate to know more with the little to no information Thor had shared with us.

"Odin," he whispered, his eyes glittered with tears. "He says I deserve it...I can't disagree. I have caused nothing but pain to those surround me, I have been vicious and selfish. I have behaved like the monster I'm bound to be."

"Did Odin tell you that?"

"I...can't really remember. It doesn't make much difference for those words are nothing but the truth. I'm a monster and monsters deserve to be punished." He speaks with so much sadness it tears me apart. The way he speaks about himself makes me believe those words are not his own, as if someone made him memorize them as a presentation speech and repeat them over and over until they were plastered on his brain.

"I don't deserve your compassion either," He continued, slowly moving away from my touch as if what I was doing had been forbidden for him all along. "Nor your help or your forgiveness...I don't deserve anything..."

His final words become a whisper and there's no doubt in my heart that what he really needs is something or someone to tell him he's worth it, that maybe he had lived with the idea of him being different for so long that when it came true he had already accepted his fate.

"Everybody deserves help and compassion and...love."

He flinches at the word, frowning in confusion.

"Love? You think someone like me, so evil and selfish deserves to be loved?" He questioned me

"Of course you do, why wouldn't you?" I speak "You have a heart and feelings just like the rest of us, just because you are different doesn't mean you're unworthy of being loved"

"People like me, who has caused so much grief and pain towards innocents can be worthy of love. How could I after all I've done? I was led and misguided by my jealousy but I cannot justify my actions with that. Everything that has happened to me is consequences of my own actions...not being loved is one of them"

"Who got all those things into your head?" I ask him and he shakes his head at the question

"No one, these thoughts are my own." He responds. His answer sounds mechanic and elaborated and very unlike his own

"Did Thor tell you this?"

"No."

"Was it Odin?"

He remains quiet which gives me the painful answer I need. Wasn't he supposed to be his father? Wasn't he supposed to help his son become a better man instead of torturing him with words of pure cruelty and coldness? Yes, Loki had done horrible things but a punishment like this made everything ten times worse, instead of making him stop it would make his anger grow.

"Why would he say that?" I ask more to myself than him

"Because it's true." Loki said sure of himself

"No, it's not..." I whisper, moving a few inches towards him, my hands reach for his face again and it's a relief he doesn't pull away, instead he leans into it with a sigh "I was like you once. I thought after all I had done, love would never be an option, but I was wrong. Love can save you, it can make you be a better person, it gives you a new light, and it gives you hope..."

"Would you love someone like me?" He asks and the question is so sudden I'm not sure how to react. He nods and smiles bitterly "1of course not..."

"I would." I answer quickly and I know he doesn't believe my words and I feel, all of a sudden, that I need to prove to him that my words are real more than anything.

The next move is so quickly I'm sure my body has a mind on its own, half of my brain is trying to process this newfound feeling for Loki that has nothing to do with the hate I'm supposed to feel.

My lips linger upon his, frozen, until I find the courage to move them and he does the same. It's slow, sensual and passionate; his hands come to rest on my hips until they find their way to the small of my back. Without breaking apart, I shift towards his lap, finding a new position in front of him. Our bodies so close together, I could feel his desire building before me, just like mine. His hands wandered through my body, his tongue licked every piece of exposed skin on its way and my body arched with desperation for his touch, fire building slowly at the pit of my stomach.

In a matter of minutes our worlds collided and our lips whispered new promises of love and hope.

**TBC**


End file.
